The Value of Friendships

The older I get, the more I realize just how important it is to have friendships. Relationships in general are tough. They require work. They require that you put your selfishness aside and think of others once in a while. It's in times of crisis that you are really shown who your support system is and how strong they are. This weekend, there have been a few things that have reminded me the value of life and the value of each other. A girl who was in my women's small group lost her mother to a heart valve defect and a couple that we are good friends with are currently in the hospital waiting the outcome of a high risk pregnancy situation. I also had my mom who was just having a bad day. In two of these situations, the people had a really great support system. Friends and family were able to lift them up and help them carry the burdens that they are dealing with. But in the third case, no one was there.

It's amazing to see the difference in the three cases. And it makes me keenly aware that I need to surround myself with good friends. I also need to BE a good friend. I have many friends and aqaintances. But I mainly have 2 that I count as my closest friends. These are the ones that I can call at 3 in the morning just to talk if I ever needed to. They are the first ones to show up when I have a crisis. They are the ones that I can bounce crazy ideas off of and they still love me even when I'm weird. I read somewhere that "A friend is one whom you can be yourself with and never fear that they will judge you. A friend is someone that you can confide in with complete trust. A friend is someone you respect and that respects you, not based upon worthiness but based upon a likeness of mind."

Today as we sat at the hospital with our friends, I watched as several people came to visit, each sharing words of encouragement, hugs and tears. At one point, there were about 8 of us crowded into this little room and we were all laughing and joking. I watched our friends' faces went from worry to peace. Friendships bring comfort. The outcome of the situtation hadn't changed but it was a little more bearable with people there to share the burden.

"Friends come and friends go, but a true friend sticks by you like family." Proverbs 18:24 (The Message)

Now sometimes, you are "family" because you were born to the same parents or you share the same grandparents. And sometimes "family" is more than just blood. You don't share the same DNA but you share the same heart. I believe I am blessed to have both. Tonight I am very grateful for my family and my friends.

Good Grief

Christmas time always has me thinking. I've probably done more thinking in the past 2 weeks than any other year at Christmas. It all started with a dream I had about my grandfather. Normally, it would be no big deal but I've never had a dream about my grandfather at all since he passed away 9 years ago. My grandfather and I were very close. My siblings and I were actually with him when he had his brain aneurysm and as he passed away. Scary for a bunch of kids to deal with. I was really upset when I woke up from my dream. It was a good dream. It was as if he was here playing with our kids and had met John. The bad part was when I woke up and realized it was only a dream.

I learned something big about myself through this though. I have never been a person that allows myself to grieve. I stuff it down and move on. I do the same thing with change or confrontation--anything that shakes my soul up. I'm calm and cool on the outside but somewhere along the way (way up on the way) it comes crawling out of the shadows when I least expect it and I have to deal with it. I think the dream about my grandfather triggered several things that I hadn't dealt with:

1. We are up for some big changes in 2007 with the church plant. I'm excited about it but I'm grieving what we will leave behind.

2. I didn't realize how much it affected me when several sets of our friends moved either to the other side of town and/or to different churches. It all happened the same month that I left my job to stay home with the kids. More change.

3. There have been a few issues between my Grandmother and my parents (as well as my aunt and uncles). I'm not involved in any of it. Yet, I haven't seen my grandmother in about a year because I've been trying to ignore the subject and not get involved. It's as if I've already lost her too.

4. My brother's wife and girls live in Louisiana. My brother lives here. I'll spare you the details. It's complicated. I haven't seen my nieces or my sister-in-law since May of 2005. I have a deep desire to have a relationship with them. I love and miss them so much. Holidays are hard without them.

My main reason for posting all of this though is that I think that I've figured out some stuff. Today, I had a good cry. "Good grief", I'll call it. I finally let myself release some the "ick" that I've been feeling and stuffing down.

Issue 1 is working itself out. I'm excited about the new things that are going to happen. That doesn't mean that I'll never have contact with everyone else ever again. We have the internet and a phone!!!

I can't really do anything with issue 2 except strive to keep in contact with these friends. We all go through seasons in our lives. Sometimes the season that we are in leads us to the next town over.

Issues 3 and 4 are touchy issues. All I can do is love all of the parties involved. None have wronged me. I hope that I haven't wronged them. I keep going back the verses in Romans 12.

"Bless those who persecute you. Don’t curse them; pray that God will bless them. Be happy with those who are happy, and weep with those who weep. Live in harmony with each other. Don’t be too proud to enjoy the company of ordinary people. And don’t think you know it all! Never pay back evil with more evil. Do things in such a way that everyone can see you are honorable. Do all that you can to live in peace with everyone." Romans 12:14-18 (New Living Translation)

I want to strive to live in peace with everyone--family, friends, everyone. And I want to continue to allow myself to grieve when life calls for it. No more stuffing. I'm not as mighty as I think I am sometimes. And "good grief" has been very healthy for me tonight. Too bad it happens to be Christmas Eve (well, Christmas day as I look at the clock!). Oh, well. :o) It all comes out when it needs to. Mine was long over due. Funny how it took 9 years for that to boil to the surface. Anyway, I've got to get to bed. The kids will be up soon ready to open presents. I can't wait!!!

Merry Christmas to all of you! May you remember the birth of our Savior, Jesus Christ today and "...do all that you can to live in peace with everyone".

Santa & Jesus

Superman wears Jack Bauer pajamas!

January 15th is going to be a glorious day. Why you say? "Chinese ships should carry toys across the ocean, not Jack Bauer. 24 is back on Jan 15th." Oh, hallelujah! :o)



In honor of one of my favorite shows of ALL TIME, I've gathered a list of funny quotes about Jack Bauer from various places on the internet. Here's to four more weeks of waiting!

When a convicted terrorist was sentenced to face Jack Bauer, he appealed to have the sentence reduced to death.

When bad things happen to good people, its probably fate. When bad things happen to bad people, it’s probably Jack Bauer.

The city of Los Angeles once named a street after Jack Bauer in gratitude for his saving the city several times. They had to rename it after people kept dying when they tried to cross the street. No one crosses Jack Bauer and lives.

The 2007 budget for the US Military covers Jack Bauer, two pistols and four billion rounds of ammunition.

Passed out, surrounded by terrorists and nerve gas, and handcuffed to a table leg, Jack Bauer laughed to himself and said, "I have them right where I want them."

When Jack Bauer ran out of ammo, he caught 3 bullets in his chest and used them to reload.

MTV once tried to 'Punk' Kiefer Sutherland by staging a robery in a store. Sutherland smiled and pulled out his SIG and shot 3 actors in the head. This is why there was a new cast on Punk'd after season one.

Life doesn't give Jack Bauer lemons. Life asks him which fruit he wants.

If Jack Bauer was in a room with Hitler, Stalin, and Nina Meyers, and he had a gun with 2 bullets, he'd shoot Nina twice.

If everyone on "24" followed Jack Bauer's instructions, it would be called "12".

Jack Bauer doesn't need to eat, sleep, or use the bathroom because his organs are afraid of making him angry.

Jack Bauer can break anyone and anything, but he will always break the protocol first.

Jack Bauer does not get taken prisoner. He puts himself in a disadvantageous position so as to make his next several killings more dramatic.

Jack Bauers calender goes from March 31st to April 2nd, no one fools Jack Bauer.

Only Jack Bauer can fly a plane from the luggage compartment.

Most pilots need 5,000 feet of runway to land a plane. Jack Bauer needs 100 feet and a gun.

Jack Bauer once forgot where he put his keys. He then spent the next half-hour torturing himself until he gave up the location of the keys.

Upon hearing that he was played by Kiefer Sutherland, Jack Bauer killed Sutherland. Jack Bauer gets played by no man.

When life gave Jack Bauer lemons, he used them to kill terrorists. Jack Bauer hates lemonade.

Superman wears Jack Bauer pajamas.

Jack Bauer is the only human in the world with the ability to make Chloe O'Brien drop the personality disorder and patch him through.

Lets get one thing straight, the only reason you are conscious right now is because Jack Bauer does not feel like carrying you.

It's no use crying over spilt milk... Unless that was Jack Bauer's milk. Oh you are so screwed.

Jack Bauer was never addicted to heroin. Heroin was addicted to Jack Bauer.

When someone asks him how his day is going, Jack replies, "Previously, on 24..."

There is the right way, the wrong way, and the Jack Bauer way. It's basically the right way but faster and more deaths.

Killing Jack Bauer doesn't make him dead. It just makes him angry.

The truth may hurt, but it doesn't hurt as much as Jack Bauer.

Don't ever ask Jack Bauer what is going on. He'll explain in the car.

Jack Bauer doesn't take fingerprints, he takes fingers.

When Google can't find something, it asks Jack Bauer for help.

Messenger bags owe Jack Bauer for single-handedly stealing them from the clutches of emo fashion and making them genuinely cool. Same thing with hoodies. And crying.

Jack Bauer once killed so many terrorists that at one point, the #5 CIA Most Wanted fugitive was an 18-year-old teenager in Malaysia who downloaded the movie Dodgeball.

Jack Bauer's favorite color is severe terror alert red. His second favorite color is violet, but just because it sounds like violent.

In the 18 months where Jack Bauer was presumed dead, Tony Almeida was put in a coma, Michelle and David Palmer were killed, a major hurricane raveged the Gulf Coast, and Rob Schneider made another movie. See what happens when Bauer isn't around?

You can lead a horse to water. Jack Bauer can make him drink.

When the boogie man goes to sleep, he checks his closet for Jack Bauer.

Jack Bauer has been to Mars. That's why there's no life on Mars.

Jack Bauer's family threw him a surprise birthday party when he was a child. Once.

Jack Bauer could get off the Lost island in 24 hours.

Jack Bauer is the reason Waldo is hiding.

“You know it's a bad day when you put your bra on backwards and it fits better.”

So it hasn't been a bad day. It's just been an eventful one! Ethan locked himself in the bathroom stall at Walmart. He thought it was funny. The long line of ladies waiting to go didn't. :o) He crawled out from under the door to get out. I had to send him back in to unlock it so the other ladies could use the potty too. Miss Erin started crawling 2 weeks ago. It's been so fun to see her go from rocking on her knees to racing across the floor at lightening speed. She's been a little mischievious lately though. She's been ripping the bows off of the presents and trying to play with all of the ornaments on the Christmas tree. It's cute and all but boy is it crazy especially since she doesn't understand "no" yet. Every minute we are chasing her. "Don't eat the cat food". "Don't crawl under the coffee table". "Leave the XBox alone". Tonight, she found the stairs. I think we are going to have dig out the baby gate and put that up. She's a dare devil and I know that I'm going to find her out on the roof one day or something. lol She's totally me. :o) Our kids are really good kids and I love them so much! There is never a dull moment!

My back is getting so much better! I've been the doctor several times now and the therapy is helping. I feel like a new woman. On a side note, I'll post more about the church planting thing sometime in the beginning of the year when I can talk details a little more.

Anyway, check out our onery girl after she "helped" herself to some baby food. Someone had given us one of those baby food feeders. I'd never used one so I thought I'd give it a try. Bad idea. Erin figured out how to take it apart. I think there is engineering in her future. lol